Fiona Duff: Bethany would not get my vote

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There is still about three weeks to go until the general election and it seems that everyone has already had quite enough.

Apparently it is called Election Fatigue when we are all sick and tired of the lot of the flaming candidates standing for election. I too would be more than happy not to hear another politician slagging off whatever party to which they are not affiliated or making any promises that we know will crumble in the face of reality.

The only person who has said anything sensible was the MP on Radio Scotland the other morning who pointed out to the other one who was in the studio (look, I was lying in bed half asleep so can’t remember any names), that the last thing that any listener wanted to hear was politicians shouting at each other.

However, what I do like is that at this point before any election is that people start to talk about politics. My sister-in-law and her husband were around for lunch at the weekend and we all had a right good ding dong about the National Health Service – each of us had our ideas on how it should be run and how money could be diverted to nurses and drugs.

On another occasion last week a person that I had always thought was a fairly reasonable chap suddenly, after a couple of glasses of wine, made Nigel Farage look like a bleeding heart liberal. Whilst his outburst wasn’t quite on a par with Enoch Powell’s “rivers of blood” speech, it certainly wasn’t out of reach of some more extreme opinions.

Indeed I do swing slightly at about this time. I read of cases of such extreme poverty where people are piled into small flats and children have to exist on the scraps from rubbish bins with tears welling up in my eyes; and then I wonder why someone with neither prospects nor money chooses to have several nippers and then expect “them” to sort them out. The answer is probably to stop reading anything which has a strong bias either way politically.

And just in case you feel the same way this is the last time I shall mention this year’s election. I mean does it really matter who runs the country, our economy, health and education when we can all wonder how on earth the producers of Coronation Street could have found quite such a dreadful actress to portray Bethany Platt? The sooner she gets deselected the better.

Shopping gets cold shoulder

Like a late April Fool, I get taken in every year. A couple of days of sunshine and warmth and off I pop to the shops to buy some summer clothes. Not much, but a nice colourful skirt and a couple of tops which almost match.

But have they been worn yet? Not on your nelly – ever since I passed over my credit card, the cold wind descended along with the rain. So they have lain in a drawer whilst the woolly jumpers and black trousers have had quite an airing.

Shall I ever learn?

City lavatory plan has gone down the toilet

I WAS quite appalled to see that Edinburgh city council is planning on closing many of the public lavatories that are sprinkled around the Capital.

Of course they cost quite a bit to service just in case a passer-by needs to spend a penny, but where would anyone go otherwise?

Edinburgh is full of tourists who don’t have a home to pop back to when nature calls, or indeed an old friend close at hand whose facilities might be available.

The main problem is that these buildings are more than likely to be converted into small coffee shops, and we all know what a cup of caffeine does to the bladder.

I predict a heck of a lot of smelly shop doorways.

Mobile phone taxi tip just the ticket

Do you ever get the feeling that your smartphone is a good deal clever than yourself?

I have now had one for several years and the only app I have ever downloaded is WalkMate, in an attempt to try and hit 10,000 steps a day. Which, of course, rarely happens.

However, there are times that I just don’t want to walk. Indeed, it was at one of those times that I picked up a beer mat (yes, you’ve guessed where I was) which was advertising GetTaxi and offering a £10 free taxi credit for all first-time rides. They promise that it is all safe and secure; with the story of Karen Buckley’s disappearance in the news this week that is definitely on everyone’s mind.

I’ve waved my magic wand and now there is even get one that is exclusive to readers of the Evening News – just download the GetTaxi app and enter EN10 for a first-time ride free £10 credit.

This could get you two rides across the city centre because the company is also running a £5 ride flat fare on any journey within central Edinburgh over the next few weeks.

Download the app at http://dl.gettaxi.co.uk/ and redeem your first-time ride.

You know it makes sense and when you’ve been looking at beer mats that is one thing that is definitely required.