John Gibson: Toasting Tom mulling over a comeback

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Drama seems to follow Tom Ponton wherever he goes. Even as far afield as his sunshine retreat in Florida. My picture shows him roughing it there over the festivities.

But he had to be wary of marauding alligators. Fox News on TV there showed a gator, escaped from a local lake, strolling in the middle of the road on Interstate 4, the state’s main highway. Glaswegian tourists mistook it for a handbag

My advice to Tom, mind it doesn’t make a meal of your bits and pieces. Stay in the car and lock the doors!

He was on his way to Dillars, one of Florida’s largest stores. “Their sale is on and I’ve got my eyes on a pair of designer shoes, reduced from 231 to 60.”

Well, he always had a touch of the style about him. Somebody knocked on his door there, asking if he could spare a suit for the homeless.

“I didn’t want to sound uncharitable but if one of my suits fitted somebody, he hardly needed charity.”

More alarming coming from Mr P, due back in Edinburgh late January, is that while he toasts in the Florida sun, in temperatures that have slumped to 76 degrees, he is contemplating a political comeback.

I understand that on hearing of a possible comeback, the wayward alligator packed up and jumped back into the pool.