Susan Morrison

Don't be fooled by this little girl - grey squirrels are not cute. Picture: John Devlin

Don’t give me cute, squirrels do my nut in – Susan Morrison

Hush your wailing and dry your tears for the white squirrel recently totalled by a motor. I remain unmoved. Call me monstrous if you like, but I have waged war on these fluffy-tailed tree rats for many a year and see ­nothing to vex me in the passing of one of their beady-eyed number.

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