A public apology to all those on the lower floor of The Ivy the other day – Hayley Matthews

I think I should probably start this week with a public apology to all those who were sitting on the lower floor of The Ivy at Saint Andrews Square last Monday.
Never underestimate the ingenuity of toddlers (Picture: Carl Court/Getty Images)Never underestimate the ingenuity of toddlers (Picture: Carl Court/Getty Images)
Never underestimate the ingenuity of toddlers (Picture: Carl Court/Getty Images)

I was let out for the afternoon and ended up having a bit of a wild lunch. I told the little one, who's only three, that he'd get to come up the town with me for a Christmas lunch and some Christmas pudding, as long as he would behave.

Let's be honest, what three-year-old doesn't want to just let rip when they're all excited about Christmas, have amazing ice cream and munch on a few sneaky sugar cubes out the sugar bowl.

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I'd been looking forward to trying the Christmas pudding in The Ivy since a friend tried their Christmas special menu and raved about it.

On the way to lunch, I was on my best behaviour and was hoping the wee one would be too – just for an hour whilst I savoured the Christmas luxury. However, he had other ideas.

To be honest I think he was just so excited to be up the town. We just love being up the town at this time of year. The lights, the atmosphere, the busy feel – I love it all. For anyone in Edinburgh who loves the Christmas experience, I have to be honest, I think The Ivy has even trumped The Dome as far as capturing the Christmas feelz.

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So, as I frothed at the mouth reading down the Christmas menu options of pates, Brussels sprouts, snowballs and mince pies, I could hear them all shouting “pick me”.

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Lunch out doesn't happen often for me (the last time I got out for lunch was pre-Covid with Mr Hayley for his birthday), so the novelty of it all wasn't going to be wasted on me as I chose the massive iconic prawn cocktail that they do which now has a Christmas twist. I genuinely have dreams of the prawn cocktails in there – seriously – so I wasn't disappointed when I tried the Christmas edition.

As I waited on my festive linguini to arrive I looked at my three-year-old who was very happy, munching away and drawing. My friend and I admired the scenery, artwork and plants as we tried to work out what the flicking sound we could hear was.

Not taking much notice we carried on chatting away, then I saw it. The Christmas lights on the plant behind my friend were going on and off, and it was my three-year-old who was doing it.

On, off, on and off, they all went then, one after the other, until I realised it was the entire bottom right half of the building he was switching on and off. Yes all the Christmas lights along the bottom half of the street were being controlled by a toddler high on sugar and excited about Christmas.

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As I chatted away with my friend, the little one had been having a ball with the light switches, his Peppa Pig stamp and the colouring set that the lovely Agata gave him. So apologies to all the staff for the light show, but a mum’s got to do what a mum’s got to do to get a Christmas lunch!

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