Korean face-shaving, a sliced forehead, and armpit hair to make Russell Crow jealous: How one day went a bit south – Hayley Matthews

It was a day when everything went a bit south.

Saturday, 4th December 2021, 4:55 am
Whatever life throws at you, a cuddle with a loved one is what matters (Picture: David Boily/AFP via Getty Images)

I'd a few things planned whilst the kids were in school and nursery midweek on what I thought was a ‘free day’.

Now a free day isn't really a free day when you're a parent. You still have lots to do, it's just you have a small window when the little people are occupied at nursery and there may be an opportunity to have a shower, read a book, phone a friend etc.

However, if you want to do these things before the bell goes, then the pressure is on!

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I had a Need-To-Do and a Want-To-Do list. The Want-To-Do list, always comes, had things like a weekly hair wash, make sure I have clean socks, check the cat trays, and shave my face (it's a Korean beauty thing – don't mock it until you've tried it. And before you get really "judgey”, I'm sure there's more than a few of you that could do with a face shave, including some of the men too!)

Face-shaving aside, none of the day went to plan at all. I was up to my eyes in washing, ironing and cleaning and feeling like I've been running in circles all day, then all of a sudden, an emergency struck.

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Mr Hayley had dropped his phone down the back of the bathroom radiator, and it landed wedged behind the skirting board. After a panicked call, the wonderful Paddy Plumber turned up in a flash to lift the radiator off the wall to get to the phone.

So there I was at the window, shaving my face, as Paddy gets to the front door and in a panic, I sliced my forehead! Yes, it’s very pretty.

Hopefully my bleeding forehead will have distracted him from the mess and my hairy armpits that would make the Gladiator version of Russell Crow jealous.

Paddy must think we live in a tip because every time he’s here I'm always “just about to tidy up”.

Paddy is one of those people who is reliable and fast! So, in lightning time he whipped the radiator off the wall, rescued the phone, had the bathroom spic and span and all back to normal, and it only took minutes! I might go chucking things down all the radiators to get them all off the wall and cleaned.

Anyway, as soon as Paddy was on his way out the door, my phone started to ring. The nursery wanted me to pick up our youngest as he was really unwell.

Rushing to the nursery half-dressed with wet hair on a cold windy December day certainly blows away the cobwebs! So as I rescued snotty child no 2 and got him home for a warm bath, snotty child no 1 was still in bed feeling sorry for himself.

He hadn't even made it to school due to the cold, so my Want-To-Do list was right out the window by now.

Later, as I sat watching Peppa Pig with a snotty toddler cuddled into me and the place looking like the January sales had just taken place, I realised the only things on either list are: look after my boys, cuddle on the sofa, and make sure everyone is OK because that’s just what us mums do.

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