Fiona Duff: Face paint raises a few eyebrows

Comedian Gary Meikle
Comedian Gary Meikle
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I have never quite understood this obsession with eyebrows. I look at some of my daughter’s friends and wonder what makes them seem so odd, then realise that what I thought was a black slug stuck above their eye is, in fact, a painted in brow.

Now I know I am a bit late to the game on this but a comedian called Gary Meikle has nailed this nonsense with a video rant that has gone viral.

Oddly enough I saw him doing this routine during his Fringe show and thought at the time how it was very funny and summed up my thoughts exactly.

Now about 13 million people have seen it, which is certainly a lot more than he could have squeezed into his tiny venue at the Gilded Balloon’s Rose Theatre, which seated about 50 people.

Of course, one of the reasons that I don’t care too much for the hairs above my eyes is that I have very few. Those that are there are almost invisible to the naked eye as they are so pale.

If I was to try to shape them into some sort of Kardashian style every morning, I’d be in the bathroom for most of the day.

There is the option of by-passing a daily ritual by undergoing something called micro blading, a type of temporary tattoo which I can’t even bear to think about. All that skin inking that is going on turns my stomach – I mean look at a handsome man like David Beckham covered in drawings all over his body; if I saw him in the street I’d run screaming to the hills.

There is obviously a distinct possibility that is the reason that he had them done in the first place.

As Gary points out, never in the history of man has one said to another, “Mate, check out the brows on her”.

I imagine that it is all something to do with a reality show like the aforementioned ghastly and inane Kardashian family. I rest my case.