Fiona Duff: Living it up on budget airlines

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There’s been quite a bit of coverage about famous people flying on budget airlines this week.

First there was Brad and Angelina, pictured, with six children in tow struggling to find their seats amidst the hoi polio with whom they are rarely in the same stratosphere. Mind you, with a brood of half a dozen, that’s probably the only way they can afford to travel. I was one of the same size of family and I can only remember having holidays in Scotland. Midgies and Scrabble – there are some things in life that just can’t be beaten and those are not two of them.

And then there was Kate Moss on easyJet celebrating her return from a detox holiday with a few swigs of vodka. Well, a girl’s got to let her hair down after all those kale smoothies, hasn’t she?

I have travelled quite a lot on “budget” airlines (if you don’t understand the inverted commas, check out the wonderful Fascinating Aida on YouTube singing Cheap Flights – it will make you laugh and cry) and have yet to witness any particularly bad behaviour. Unless you count that time that my daughter threw a Pringle at her brother. As you can imagine I was flaming furious as they cost a fortune when you buy them on board.

There was one time when flying back from Italy that we shared the flight with the Hibs team who had been out training somewhere near Pisa. If I was going to experience any rowdy carousing in mid-air, this would be the moment, or so I thought. As it was they were paragons of virtue – I didn’t even hear the noise of a beer can opening. Most of them just spent the flight with their eyes closed and their mouths open, which is never a good look to be honest. Perhaps they had had a hard night the previous evening.

So when I fly to Split next month I must remember not to take a bottle of vodka – Kate Moss in a bad state still looks so much more glamorous than the rest of us.