John Gibson: About this nose job for Bobby . . .

Allanah Trimle
Allanah Trimle
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Pass me a Bonio. While Bobby was having his nose powdered at Greyfriars (don’t spare the eyeliner) we should have been sparing a thought for the two Alsatians “put to sleep” by the heartless, hapless Ministry of Defence soon as Prince William moved out of RAF Anglesey to even comfier pastures.

Bruce and Blade, who had been guarding the Duke, were euthanised. Just like that. The men from the Ministry, barking up the wrong tree as ever, should have got the needle.

Higher heroine

She’s what might be termed “a slip of a girl”, just turned 16. But she’s making the most of her “spare time” while studying for her highers in her fifth year at the Mary Erskine School for Girls.

Volunteer Alannah Trimble is raising funds for the Erskine Home for retired ex-servicemen (keep me a bedspace, please) with her own greeting cards with a professional polish.

Alannah is shaping like a girl who’ll go places, as her doctor dad will concur, presumably.

Afterwords . . .

. . . Quick or you’ll have missed him. It’s Usain Bolt talking: “I never really think about being the fastest man ever. I’ve learnt that records come and go. I could be sitting here talking to you and somebody calls and says ‘Hey, you’re no longer the fastest man in the world’. But being a champion, that stays for ever. I’ve been Olympic champion six times. I want to make it nine and make history.”