John Gibson: Big ladies and lesser lads

John wants to see Al Pacino in Edinburgh. Picture: Getty
John wants to see Al Pacino in Edinburgh. Picture: Getty
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BELIEVE me I never have problems in this department. I was a towering five seven and three quarters inches when I joined the military. Hunky with it, mind you.

But somebody, possibly a self-conscious circus performer, is posing the question; why do so many, shall we say, men on the diminutive side, latch on to lofty women?

Let’s see, and I’m counting as I scribble. There’s Bernie Formula 1 Ecclestone with Fabia Flosi, Commons Speaker John Bercow and long tall Sally, Ronnie Corbett and Anne, Rod Stewart and Penny.

Don’t know how Hollywood movie idol Alan Ladd fared with the women in his life but directors always had him film furthest away from the cameras whenever he was helped on to his horse. Danny DeVito says it’s the height of impudence asking about his women friends.

Talking of billionaire Ecclestone, it’s rumoured Elton John, for a million, will perform at Tamara Eccleston’s wedding next month.

Peanuts considering comedians Peter Kay and funny-as-toothache Michael McIntyre have trousered £32 million and £21 million respectively these last two years. So vulgar, these wages. Shouldn’t be true.

Al no’ be there

The hell with London. Get up here, Al, and we’ll pack the Usher Hall to hear what you have to say, with or without the scar. One of my favourite actors, at the London Palladium on June 2 in An Evening with Al Pacino, talks about his career and invites questions. Here’s one for a start, was your agent offered Edinburgh? Here’s another, have you ever heard of Edinburgh?