Talk of the Town: Carol almost gets an eyeful on stage

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TELEVISION star Carol Smillie has told of how a serial flasher almost derailed her performance at the city’s Festival Theatre.

Prior to going on stage as part of the Hormonal Housewives show, staff warned that a kilt-wearing man, who looked like former England goalkeeper David Seaman, had form for revealing himself.

And Smillie, 49, recalled: “Sure enough, there he was sitting right bang in the middle of the front row. He had women on either side of him whom he clearly wasn’t with. It takes quite a lot of front to do that, if you’ll pardon the expression.

“The kilt kept creeping up and up and I was thinking ‘any minute now’. But he seemed to bottle it at the last minute.”

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STAYING on the theme of Scotland’s national dress, an Edinburgh-based tartan firm says it is bringing “power to the people” in the quest for the perfect design.

Scotweb is to launch the world’s largest tartan library online, meaning up to 60,000 different designs will be viewable.

It is the first time such a facility has been launched, the company says, and while it should be of benefit to potentially millions, it admitted: “The odd tartan veteran may complain as they’re losing their power to dictate our choices.”

And while this is revolutionary in the tartan world, it is unclear whether or not the company will press on with plans to create tartan paint.

TV pair are real losers

SINGING double act Zedd and Saffire have collectively lost four stone since embarking on the Jenny Craig weight loss programme. The Portobello couple, who failed to impress music mogul Simon Cowell during their audition on Britain’s Got Talent last year, have now reached their goal weight after losing two stone each.

And it was seeing themselves on TV that made Zedd and Saffire, whose real names are Craig and Debborah Stephens, realise that they wanted to lose some weight.

Craig said: “It’s really true what they say about the camera adding 10lbs. When we looked at photos of ourselves, we didn’t recognise the people we’d become.”

Virgin on the ridiculous

LISTENERS could have been forgiven for thinking Radio Five Live presenter Peter Allen had been having visions when he announced on his programme that Northern Rock had been “taken over by Virgin Mary”.

The formerly-nationalised bank had, of course, been bought by Edinburgh-based Virgin Money.