A Festival-goers’ guide to the Fringe comedy show scene - Vladimir McTavish

Catch my show 30 Years Still Standing Up, at The StandCatch my show 30 Years Still Standing Up, at The Stand
Catch my show 30 Years Still Standing Up, at The Stand
Edinburgh residents cannot have failed to notice that the Fringe is about to hit town. As I predicted in these pages a couple of weeks back, the giant billboards are already popping up in every available square-inch of railing or lamp post.

Where no such space exists, huge free-standing boards have been erected.

Lots of you will look at these posters and think “who are these people?’ Even I’ve had that thought and I work in the business. The other day, I walked along the garden side of Queen Street, on the block between Castle Street and Frederick Street, perusing the faces on display. My impressions went as follows:

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Poster number one: Seen him on telly, probably wouldn’t want to see him live.

Number two: Mate of mine, very funny. Three: Never heard of them. Four: Who?

Five: I’ve seen them be amusing for fifteen minutes but sixty would be stretching my patience. Six: I heard somebody mention him once. Seven: This person’s act is execrable s**t and they’re a pain in the a**e off stage.

I think next year, I might offer a walking tour of the city which would help punters decide what shows to see. They’d follow me around all the large poster sites in town as I gave my fully-impartial, opinion on the shows on offer.

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Having your face on a giant billboard is no barometer of quality. All you need is money. Lots of it. Obviously, the cost gets passed on to the ticket-buying public, hence the hike in ticket prices every year. It’s because performers are giving away huge sums of money to the distribution companies who have taken control of our lamp posts.

For the first weekend of the Fringe, I too have decided to give away a fair bit of money. But rather that shell out to some bunch of charlatans to stick my picture on to park railings, I’m going to put that money back into the pockets of the public.

Next weekend, tickets for my show 30 Years Still Standing Up, at The Stand, will be on sale at 1994 prices. Simply log on The Stand’s website, select my show and enter the code “VLADHALF”

If you enjoy the show, buy me a pint in the bar afterwards.

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