​D:Ream and Wet Wet Wet – Sunak’s election timing is a damp squib - Vladimir McTavish

Prime Minister Rishi Sunak issue a statement outside 10 Downing Street after calling a general election for July 4

As general election launches go, Rishi Sunak’s announcement on Wednesday will surely go down in history as one of the dampest squibs of all time.

The PM tried to look as positive as anyone can when they are standing behind a podium in an otherwise empty street with rain lashing down on them without even a brolly for protection.

To make matters worse, some bright spark had set up a sound system round the corner which was blaring out Labour’s 1997 victory anthem “Things can only get better”.

Those words have never sounded so apt. In fact, Rishi could almost have lip-synced along to the lyrics.

The entire scenario left the impression that what he was really saying was “OK, the weather might be crap, but it will soon be summer” or “don’t worry, I’ll be gone by the fourth of July.”

The general consensus is that calling a snap election in July is either a huge gamble or a colossal mistake. I guess the PM himself probably thinks the same. Why is he going to the country so soon?

He’s either just seen a really cheap holiday deal on Skyscanner or he’s taken advantage of his green card and lined up a lucrative job in the States.

Either way, his prospects look about as bleak as this week’s weather. Perhaps he is holding out the hope that the England football team could come to his rescue. A good run in next month’s Euros could engender a feel good factor in the Red Wall seats.

Football can have a huge effect on voter behaviour. It’s widely believed Harold Wilson lost the 1970 general election because England were knockout of the World Cup days earlier.

So, if Southgate’s men are knocked out at the group stage, it could be curtains for Sunak. Yet another reason for Scottish people wanting the England team to do badly.

Talking of football, the fat referee fired the first shots of the campaign north of the border.

Douglas Ross called the vote “a chance to end the SNP’s obsession with independence”.

Of course they’re obsessed with independence. They’re the SNP. It’s their raison d’être. It’s why the party was formed in the first place.

It’s like the Tories’ obsession with selling off every state-owned enterprise to their mates in the City of London.

Or the Lib Dems’ obsession with offering the public very little apart from the chance to have a laugh at endless crass photo opportunities.

Or Labour’s obsession with, er, well nobody’s really sure what Labour’s obsession is these days. Apart from their obsession of not being The Party Of Jeremy Corbyn.

Anyway, prepare for six weeks of endless opinion polls, indicating percentage swings across the board and in key marginals and how this could translate to numbers of seats in the Commons, blah blah.

Plus six weeks of pointless analysis about what may be the effects of a July election on the results in Scotland.

Expect six weeks of men in suits making empty promises, but above all look forward to six weeks of embarrassing photo opportunities.

Although the bar has been set very high this year. Surely no-one can come up with an image better than some desperate idiot standing behind a podium outside in the pouring rain.