Hayley Matthews: Joey the cat will give me the bum's rush in the end

I'm sitting writing this as my six-year-old and his friend play on the computer whilst jumping about like little lunatics and have asked them what I should write about.

Monday, 10th September 2018, 7:00 am
Hayley's cat Joey is so popular he's got his own fan club

I’ve been given three topics; bum cheeks, Fortnite and Joey our cat. I have to be honest and say if I write about bum cheeks then you’d probably never read my column again and I’m all Fortnited out so, Joey the cat it is.

Now, Joey isn’t your normal cat, he’s a total character. I have people in the local shops, library and school all ask me about him, often. One mum said to me “I was a little impressed when you told me you worked on the telly, but I’m even more impressed that you’re Joey’s mum!” Yes, he’s that big a deal.

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He’s had his share of fun adventures. He’s journeyed to Holyrood Palace, voyaged to Earthy Foods in Portobello and even done a stint at a party flat for a month where the party host mistook him for her cat and decided she was keeping him.

I managed to convince her after they all sobered up that he was in fact my cat and all was well. So little Joey has an interesting story and is quite something.

I’m pleased to report that he’s calmed down a bit now. However, this has worried the locals and a lovely gentleman called me during the week to ask if Joey was ok.

He said he was calling from the Joey Cat Appreciation Society – and this has made my week! My faith in there being good people in the world has been restored.

Our cat is a little gem and is sitting licking his bum cheeks without blinking an eye, all whilst my son and his friend bounce about the sofa. Ah, got bum cheeks in after there all!

Should it really be game over on the Christmas list at the age of six?

I heard a frightening fact during the week, something along the lines of “there are only 15 Fridays until Christmas”!

Now how is that even possible? We’ve just had the summer holiday and autumn is just about to arrive. I’ve been putting the feelers out for what Santa should bring my son and I’m struggling to find games that don’t involve computers or iPads. Everything I suggest like board games, football gear, toys etc get a snub. YouTuber “Morgz” merchandise and Vbucks (gaming currency) are the only items that have made it to the Santa list so far and I’m trying desperately to change it! Is six really the age that computers take over now?

The realisation of this struck me when wrapping a Cars Aquabeads toy set for my friend’s son, thinking what fun he’ll have with a creative toy. He can make his favourite characters with the beads using his imagination and I thought it would be good for dexterity. He loves playing with toys when we see him, he isn’t that interested in computers and he’s only a few years younger than my six-year old.

I speak to many parents saying that they can’t get their kids to play with “toys” as they much prefer the computer or iPad. However, there is part of me realises that times have changed and even homework is done on iPads in high school, computers are everywhere and being tech-savvy is a must for any career. I suppose there needs to be a balance between technology and play, so Santa will be bringing Twister and Scrabble regardless of whether they’re on the list or not. And, with a little nudge, the computer will get a night off!