ScotRail should lay on a first class welcome to West Highlands

Sometimes I forget what an incredibly beautiful country we live in. We’ve so much scenery we could probably flog some off and still have loads left over. People come from all over the world, just to travel one scenic railway line, the West Highland line.

This wealth of globally acknowledged stunning beauty could, heaven forbid, make us big-headed.

Thank goodness for ScotRail to bring us back to earth. John Knox Railways, the joyless way to travel, certainly rises to the occasion. Not for the West Highland Line the luxury of 21st century carriages with ergonomically designed seats. Och no, not when there’s a pair of clapped out 1980’s bone-shakers sitting about doing nothing. Let's use those.

It's faintly retro. Quite the trip down memory lane for me. I’d forgotten just how cramped travel used to be, even for vertically challenged Glaswegians. My heart went out to the party of cheery folk from the Netherlands who grew ever quieter the further north we travelled. Tall folk, the Dutch

Narrow, those seats. There is little comfort for the larger traveller, as the lady wedged in to my right complained.

This trip is tourist catnip with travellers who have cash to flash. You'd expect ScotRail would offer a First Class option. Nope. Presbyterian Rail, the grim way to get about, boasts no such pandering. You'll have had your luxury coming up from London.

Astonishingly they do have a trolley which includes ‘alcoholic beverages’. The folks travelling to Inverness will be pea-green with envy.

The redeeming feature, aside from the scenery, is the crew. Cheery, helpful and given to endlessly announcing that the train will split at Crianlarich. Two carriages head for Oban, the rest to Fort William

This was a matter of great excitement to my train-loving husband, and tremendous bemusement to one American lady, who seemed to have missed those near constant warnings. It was all sorted out efficiently and with that cheery humour.

The customer care mask only briefly slipped to reveal exasperated raised eyebrows and a weary head shake.

Oh, ScotRail. This trip is a jewel in our tourist crown. Let's lay on a first class welcome.