Still looking for that perfect Christmas gift? Here’s the answer - Susan Morrison

Happy Christmas, darling

For some reason, adults aren’t supposed to be so upfront. There’s a cut-off somewhere and openly admitting what you want gift-wrapped becomes unacceptable. Grown-ups have to guess what makes their partners happy.

That 42 per cent of all marriages currently end in divorce suggests they didn’t really know each other as well as they thought. Guessing Christmas present choices was a bit of a minefield. Probably contributed to the breakup.

Those first few Christmases are easy. I watch them in the St James Quarter, drifting along hand-in-hand. Trust me, sister, he’s only pretending to like shopping. The give-away? Those hints you dropped went unheard.

What a laugh on Christmas morning when you realise he’s misinterpreted your subtle suggestion. You’ve just unwrapped a hot water bottle. You had been pointing at a beautiful pair of swish silky pyjamas that you described as a ‘hot little bedtime number’.

And by ‘you’ I mean ‘me’. Yes, I was that mildly disappointed gal. As our relationship lengthened and deepened, I discovered that Yorkshiremen do not do hints. Even direct requests can be mangled.

I thought one Christmas choice was clear until I found my husband's festive gift aide memoire. Apparently I wanted something ‘smelly from the clinic’. It’s a perfume called Aromatics. It's by Clinique.

The next year I raised my game and asked for Nina Ricci L'Air Du Temps Eau de Toilette. Don’t even like it, but was fascinated to see what would come back. Air freshener for the bathroom, since you ask.

The word “Toilette” threw him off, you see. And, young sisters, as the years go by, selecting gifts for the man in your life gets no easier. There’s a limit to the jumpers, socks and aftershave you can buy.

Here’s my advice. Make them take up a hobby. There’s no end to the falderals you get for fishing, running or stamp-collecting.

Better still, just take the guess-work out and ask them.