Susan Morrison: Dreich destinations are the way ahead – and we’re in top spot
It was a traditional Scottish summer's day earlier this week. On the Dreich Weather Scale, I'd say it was about an 8. Smirry rain, occasionally getting mildly enthusiastic, low lying cloud, a chill breeze and the sun a mere memory.
It was the first days of the Fringe. The streets were hoachin’ with tourists. I found myself standing next to some Americans, decked out in Saltire rain ponchos and tartan brolleys. That’s not what I would call holiday wear. I worried about them being miserable, so I apologised for the weather.
Needn't have bothered. By jingo, they loved it. They were from some heat-benighted part of the States, which I think is currently all of it. This cool, breezy climate was sublime. They loved their rainwear, couldn't wait to show the folks back home, but worried that the ponchos might melt. They are pretty flimsy, to be fair.
Later that day, I bumped into pals from London practically dancing in the puddles. The great metropolis is in the grip of one heatwave after another. Summer sunshine used to be considered a good thing, but the novelty wears off faster than a commuter's deodorant.
Our weather has brightened, but Scotland’s kept her cloudy cover over her head.
It used to be said that no-one came to Scotland for the weather, but now it looks like we’ve got exactly what an over-heating world wants.
We need a tourist campaign. A be-kilted hunk standing in the rain looking mean and moody. Well, he would be. A soggy sporran is no laughing matter. No matter, it's the message that counts, that everyone looks cooler with drizzle dribbling down their chin. Well, Sam Heughan does.
Anyway, we wouldn’t be selling them kilts. I see a great future for Scottish rainwear. Let's bring back the Pakamac Rainhood. Yes, they were horrible, but our brilliant young designers could surely re-invent that staple of every grannies bag. Get on it, kids.
Off to write to VisitScotland. Dreich destinations are the way ahead. It's a sure-fire winner. If they want to thank me, they can let me help out on that photo-shoot with Sam Heughan.