Baby showers. You might not know what that is, so I’ll explain. It’s another American thing. Everybody goes to visit the mum-to-be, and everybody coos a lot.
There’s usually white wine. Not for the expectant mother, obviously, even though that might be how she got to be guest of honour at a baby shower in the first place.
Everyone brings a present for the baby and everyone watches what everyone has brought.
It can all get as tense as a spaghetti Western stand-off as women weigh up the value of gifts. Whatever happened to knitting a wee matinee jacket?
Just stop it. For one thing, mum might feel like death warmed up and just want to go for a nap.
And secondly, call me superstitious, but buying gifts before baby gets here safely always makes me nervy.