Record numbers on the trams? Now, if we can only make them pay ...

'The tram is coming and it will be warm and swift,' say Susan Morrison (Picture: Lisa Ferguson)

This, of course, is not true. We probably clocked the problem about 15 minutes in, but the Morrison fault-denying gene is so strong that we would have denied any navigational blunder until seriously called out on it.

Therefore, admitting errors is hard, but I have fought my genetic inheritance and I stand here to say, the trams are great.

Yes, I know, I rumbled and fulminated. Harsh words and phrases may have been used. I recall, bitterly, the battles of the trenches and fences, when crossing Leith Walk turned into a sort of urban assault course that would have left a Royal Marine weeping with frustration.

Who can forget the fun of the traffic cone slalom? The sheer joy of driving down to the Republic late at night to find that some booze-fuelled bozo had switched the cones on closed-off road lanes for a laugh, and suddenly the Number 22 bus was barrelling straight at you. Whole lives flashed before my eyes, and they weren’t all mine. How our bus drivers didn’t turn into deranged psychopaths is anyone’s guess.

But now I confess, I adore a wee hurl on a tram. So sleek and quiet, gliding smoothly uptown. And yes, I whinged for Scotland when it came to the constant ding-ding of the bell, but on a cold winter night with the wind and rain cutting in sideways that cheery little sound warms the soul. The tram is coming and it will be warm and swift.

The on-board staff are pleasant and friendly. I watched them on our non-firework Hogmanay redirecting tourists to Leith to cheaper and open pubs to see in the Bells – I do worry sometimes what happened to that couple from Wisconsin.

So, I am not surprised that they’ve enjoyed a record-breaking run of passenger numbers. Now, if we can only make them pay.