Coronavirus: Washing your hands properly is like having a mini-spa! – Susan Morrison

Hot water, soap, a hot hand dryer or a fluffy towel, and maybe a squish of hand cream – washing your hands can be a luxurious experience (and it might just stop you getting coronavirus), writes Susan Morrison.

Hand-washing is not a trial for Susan (Picture: PA)

People! Keep calm and keep washing your hands. Armageddon may be thundering towards us, but just reach for that hand sanitiser, make sure you sing Happy Birthday twice as you soap up your digits, and I know we can beat this thing.

No less a personage than our Prime Minister himself has emerged from wherever he was lurking to tell us that there is nothing to worry about and he will still shake hands.

I think that’s a spiffing idea, and I am sure we can find people for him to shake hands with. There are some people in an isolation ward who’d love to meet him. Just think how their morale would sky-rocket.

Of course, you can always “self-isolate” or, as we used to call it when I were a lass, “staying in”.

I must confess to a mild air of smugness here. I’ve always been a bit Howard Hughes when it comes to washing my hands. In fact, I really enjoy it. Hot water, bit of soap, hot hand dryer, lovely. If you’re in a posh place – looking at you, Balmoral – you might even score a fluffy towel and a wee squish of hand cream. It’s like a mini-spa during a busy day.

I’m not quite so keen on those super posh loos that have attendants hovering about. What if one has been over-indulging in the curry the night before?

No one wants to come out of the cubicle to face the reproachful eyes of a woman who knows you’ve just done damage to the ozone layer.

And yes, gentlemen, ladies do occasionally produce scents that are less than fragrant. I know. Who would have thought it?